For many of my patients, getting an aesthetic treatment is a very private thing…
…So private that they don’t even tell their spouse or partner.
But recently, I’ve noticed a new trend.
Increasingly, we’re seeing couples where both partners are getting treatments. And not only are they open about this with each other, but sometimes they’re even coming into Parfaire to discuss or get their treatments at the same time.
To understand a bit more about this trend, I’ve been talking to some of these couples about their motivations for seeking treatment and the impact on their relationship.
Meet Johanna and Steve, both in their late 50s.
Johanna has been getting aesthetic treatments since she turned 50.
“My friendship group was several years younger than me, and I felt that I was looking old by comparison. You look in the mirror and feel you don’t look like you used to, and start to lose a bit of confidence. I decided to do something about it…”
She had no hesitation about discussing her intentions with Steve.
“I told him I was unhappy with the way I was looking,” she says. “We have a healthy lifestyle and both maintain our fitness, so he was very supportive. He didn’t know much about aesthetics, so he was quite interested in what I was having. I explained to him what I was going to do, told him how much it was going to cost and what it would do for me.
“We talk about everything anyway – we don’t have secrets…”
Steve adds: “We’ve always maintained that you do things in life that make you happy, so if aesthetics was going to give Johanna more confidence, I said go for it!”
His own interest in aesthetics was sparked around three years later, for career-related reasons. Steve gives lots of speeches and presentations, and realized that looking more youthful would increase both his own confidence and his impact.
Seeing Johanna’s results undoubtedly made a difference. “Once I started seeing the benefit, I saw this was quite applicable to men as well, particularly those with very public roles.”
As for Johanna, she was delighted for him to go ahead.
“There’s no difference to me getting treatments. We both want to continue looking well-maintained, so when he said he felt he needed something, I agreed. The anti-wrinkle injections worked well for him – he looked better for it.”
He’s been continuing with those treatments regularly, whilst Johanna has also had dermal fillers and skin-boosters.
And they made a joint appointment to discuss Sculptra, although they both say this was mostly a matter of convenience. As a measure of how comfortable Steve is with aesthetics nowadays, he decided to go ahead whilst Johanna decided it was not for her!
One difference between them is that Johanna has always been very open about her treatments with her friends, whilst Steve was secretive – at least at first.
“It took a while for me to open up about it,” he says. “Given that my friendship group is roughly the same age, it finally came up and I realized it was more accepted for males to have treatments.
“Nowadays I’m like a walking salesman. I’ve sent my brother to get treatments too – and even people I didn’t think would be interested were very interested! It’s latent within a lot of males, but we need a ‘permission moment’ to do it.
“I suspect a number of my friends had always thought about treatments, but it was only once they saw I was doing it that they all went ahead…”
Johanna and Steve’s attitude to aesthetics seems very healthy to me. They’re not trying to fix or change each other. They both simply like aging gracefully, and enjoy seeing each other happy.
Both getting treatments is “a bonding experience,” adds Steve. “I see it as similar to having a massage or working out at the same time, or other activities you’d share. I’m surprised more people don’t do this together.”
And they both expect to do more treatments in future.
“The genie is out of the bottle,” jokes Steve, but then adds seriously: “Life’s too short to wait for things you really want. Looking youthful and feeling your best falls into that.”
So what about you? If you have a partner, are you able to discuss getting an aesthetic treatment openly with them? And have they ever considered getting a treatment themselves? Let me know – I’d love to hear your story.